After the bonanza that was the last two weeks, the powers that be have decided to give us all a nice break for a bit, before everything gets all Bond-y next week. If you like children’s films (by which I mean not Pixar, Disney, or Dreamworks films, but Robo-Dog level films) then you’re set. Otherwise, there’s a Ryan Reynolds thing; the most horrific, ridiculous idea for a film ever; and Groot killing witches.
As Halloween looms closer and closer, October starts spitting out even more horror films. The Last Witch Hunter looks like one of those – but is actually a supernatural action film according to Wikipedia, so what do I know? The film tells the story of an immortal witch-hunter who sets out to stop an impending apocalypse from destroying New York, and stars Vin Diesel, Elijah Wood, and Rose Leslie. There’s not much in the way of reiews out for the film yet, so you’ll probably be going in blind, but Wood is an accomplished horror actor, and Vin Diesel’s in it. Groot is in it. That’s got to count for something. The film is released on Wednesday.
Up next is a little British film (with its Britishness being pretty much the only thing it’s got going for it). Between Two Worlds is a rom-com about a guy who goes on a bender in London and then has an existential crisis. It stars Chris Mason (a bit-part character in Legend), Hannah Britland (a bit-part character in Rush), and Example (yes, as in the rapper from 2007). The only review of the film I can find gives it 3 stars. It receives a limited release on Friday.
Another teeny tiny film this week is animated kids’ film The Big Knights. Based on the TV series of the same name from the turn of the century, the film follows two knights, Sir Boris and Sir Morris as their kind-hearted idiocy gets them wrapped up in various adventures and shenanigans. The film features the voices of Alexander Armstrong (Armstrong and Miller, Pointless) and Brian Blessed (Flash Gordon). It receives limited release on Friday.
Moving back up the cinematic ladder by some way, our fourth film this week is American dramedy Mississippi Grind. Starring almost-superstar Ryan Reynolds (I’d say Deadpool will be his big break, but it’s Ryan Reynolds – he seems almost destined to never quite make a decent film), alongside Ben Mendelsohn and Sienna Miller, the film follows a pair of gamblers trying to reverse their recent run of bad luck. It may well prove to be one of those films that has like 90% on Rotten Tomatoes, purely because everybody has agreed that it’s a bit better than average. It’s released on Friday.
Another kids’ film (because the latter half of October is apparently prime-time for horrors and zany children’s films now) this week is Australian Paper Planes. The film, starring Sam Worthington (Avatar), follows the aspirations of a young boy who wants to compete in the World Paper Plane Competition in Japan. I’d say something about the ridiculousness of the plot, but lonely-man-is-aroused-by-computer has been the basic premise of two of the best films made in the past couple of years, so who knows, this could be an emotional powerhouse or a gripping thriller. It’s released on Friday.
Wrapping things up this week is the news that a bunch of wankers with a handheld camera have discovered the true nature of the fifth dimension, and it’s full of spooky-spooky ghosts. Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension is the fifth or sixth or seventeenth instalment of one of several film series that exist as both shameless cash-cows and the antithesis of cinema. In this film, some people move into a house, the house is haunted, and they film it. But (and this is the kicker, I mean this just really revolutionises the medium) they film it in 3D. A 3D found-footage film. Just… let that sink in. Again, it’s released on Friday.
