Review: Lady Gaga – ‘Million Reasons’

7
20%
20
Boring

A charming melody, but then again Bran Flakes are a charming cereal.

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One of three tracks recently debuted on the opening of her dive bar tour, ‘Million Reasons’ is Lady Gaga’s latest tease of upcoming album Joanne after lead single ‘Perfect Illusion.’ Trying to be a sweet little ditty, it pleasantly falls into a confusing middle ground of ‘indie-flavoured pop’ that wants to be ‘indie pop’ but which never actually makes it. It boasts a lo-fi vibe and seems to be trying really hard to prove to you to that it’s delicate and indie and wholesome and totally wasn’t recorded in the presence of a multi-million dollar production team. From more authentic voices, I’ve heard the same song countless times before.

The above star rating feels mean because this is an average track, and average should surely mean a solid, middle-of-the-road 3/5 – and I truly want to give it that. But this track is lacklustre, and I don’t mean lacklustre for Gaga. It’s boring, point blank. It’s got the bare minimum for a song: a simple melody and some pretty vocals. That’s like saying a food is edible and has some form of nutritional value. Perfectly palatable but thoroughly forgetful, ‘Million Reasons’ is the auditory equivalent of Bran Flakes.

‘Million Reasons’ is out now via Interscope

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Features Editor 2015/16. Marine biology PhD student and mint chocolate lover. Sorry I give everything five stars, I just have a lot of love in my heart.

7 Comments

    • avatar
      Scott Williams on

      That’s completely irrelevant. Her review is her response, and I think she would know better than you or I or anybody else what that was and why she had it, Try commenting with an actual criticism, rather than some lazy recycled line for a couple of pride points.

  1. avatar

    I think this is a little harsh. Your right that it feels a little like a “confusing middle ground of ‘indie-flavoured pop’ that wants to be indie pop”. But to say it’s boring is a little unfair: there is a certain calming-lullaby feel to it that while could come across as boring to me feels more like a hint of hopelessness and despair. I think its got more merit than the 1* judgement delivers it. There is a concept behind it that might fit in to the broader theme of exposing vocals over wackyness that, we are told, is part of Gaga’s latest project. It’s not brilliant, but its not the ‘auditory equivalent of Bran Flakes’ either. I’d say 3*.

    • avatar

      I don’t deny any of that – and that’s the thing. I kind of went for the 1* to be a little fun because I feel like I hand out a lot of 3* ratings to stuff that’s perfectly pleasant. And this track IS perfectly pleasant. But the fact is, I really wanted more from Gaga. I’ve loved the way her music has grown and morphed, her stuff with Tony Bennett was just !!! sublime.

      I like a lot of the other stuff on Joanne more, because it feels a little special. This is just so middle of the road for me – and from someone who we know for a fact can deliver power and punch in countless different ways, that doesn’t mean it’s average. That means it’s disappointing. It’s a 3* in spirit, but I was trying to be divisive :’P

      • avatar
        Bruno Russell on

        Ah okay fair enough. I just like the way it sets the tone for Gaga making her music more vocally exposing. Its dissapointing set against expectations from before, but this is new Gaga and I like the quirky newness. Its certainly not polished and is stagnating a little but I’ll guess we’ll just have to wait for the album 🙂

    • avatar

      I’m with you on that James! I can barely stand the song, let alone remember any of it. Possibly the dullest thing I’ve listened to ever.

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