Things that should be banned at festivals

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Following on from American festivals Coachella and Lollapalooza banning selfie sticks, and indie Oxford based festival, Truck, banning Katie Hopkins (as she voiced opinons that the festival ‘disagree wholeheartedly with’), The Edge team considered what they’d like banned from this summers festivities…

Inappropriate Mosh Pits – Chris Evans
Like all things, moshpits have a time and a place. No matter how much you’d rather be over at the mainstage seeing so-and-so than being dragged along to see a local singer-songwriter at the introducing stage, it is by no means an invitation to vent your dissatisfaction by trying to rile up the crowd to keep yourself entertained. Taking it upon yourself to ‘liven up’ a crowd that they don’t deem exciting enough is just downright disrespectful to people that are genuinely trying to enjoy the music. Don’t get me wrong, the sight of a swirling circle pit to the sound of Enter Shikari never fails to impress, however, a bunch of guys shoving each other about in the silent disco… not so much.

Native American style headdress – Martyna Posluszna
“Isn’t that so cool that we don’t seem to care about the cultural significance of these things?!”, seems to come across the minds of all the indie/hipster/whatever-is-non-mainstream-these-days people attending music festivals wearing war bonnets. You’re not impressing anyone. Sure, Native American headdresses are magnificent as hell but shouldn’t this little thing called decency prevent you from profaning items of spiritual importance?

iPads – Martyna Posluszna
Using tablets to take pictures/record videos at music festivals is so ridiculous, it is almost impressive someone dared to start the trend. Needles to say, using your iPad during the concert is bound to be cumbersome as well as SO annoying for the people around you.
Flags – Bridie Pearson-Jones
Flags at a festivals are just a little controversial, and many festivals have banned them now. If you’re in two minds about taking one to a festival, just don’t. It might be great to come from Wales, but if a ridiculously large flaming red Dragon is blocking the view of the band the person behind you has paid £200+ to come and see, they’re gonna get more than a little annoyed. Yeah, it’s great for finding your friends, but annoying for the thousands of other festival goers. If you must, these are borderline acceptable in the camping area (although you’re opening yourself up as a target) but dear god don’t take these into the crowd.
Flower Crowns – Georgia Simpson
In ancient Greece, flower crowns honoured the gods and kings, now they are style for girls who have gone to a festival for the fashion not for the music. Unless you are five years old you should not be wearing a flower crown. Festivals are slowly becoming more of a fashion parade for the rich and famous rather than an appreciation for the music – i.e. Coachella with Vanessa Hudgens’ being crowned ‘Queen of Coachella’ due to her fashionable outfits including the aforementioned flower crown. Flower crowns are now the go to ‘look’ for girls and some guys, to wear just so they have that chic ‘festival vibe’, where in fact they look like they’ve just rolled in the grass and got some leaves stuck in there two-day old hair! These flower crowns need to be put to bed, they have had there time and now they just look tacky and just a bit silly really.
LADs – Toby Leveson
You will come across two forms of ‘LADs’ at music festivals; the first will pretend to like your favourite band, ruin the experience for you and probably piss up your leg, whilst the second are those you see both on your way to and from the music arena drinking by their tents, who believe ‘music festival’ is synonymous for a weekend bender in which you get to misogynise over girls who claim to be alternative. If you want to drink and prove your masculinity in a field do us a favour and not spend £200 to ruin everyone else’s weekend.
Acoustic Guitars – Hannah Mylrea
We get it, this one time your Mum told you that you’re basically the next George Ezra and should definitely be playing on the Pyramid Stage; but I speak for everybody when I say we don’t need your slurred version of ‘Wonderwall’ at four in the morning whilst we’re trying to sleep. Leave the music to the professionals, and leave the guitar at home.
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About Author

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Snack queen and entertainment journalist. Records Editor 2014-2015 & News Editor 2013-2014 for The Edge.

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Film and English student also into music and travelling.

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Third year Film student, Head of External Relations for The Edge and Vice President of FilmSoc. I love tea and I also love Disney. A lot.

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Politics student and head of all things musical at Surge Radio. Doesn't understand youth culture. Refers to himself in third person (he doesn't really).

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Second year Politics and Economics student hoping to go into a career in journalism. Editor at the Edge's sister publication, Wessex Scene, and Politics Editor at The Student Times, and Kettle Mag.

2 Comments

  1. avatar
    Live and Let Live on

    I can understand the rest of these because they have the potential to ruin things for others, but what’s so bad about flower crowns? They’re not for me personally but I definitely don’t think wearing one means you’ve come to a festival just for “the fashion”… Like, I’m not sure if anyone (except maybe a celeb or two) has ever come to a festival for anything other than the music/experience. Who cares if people wear things that you think are “tacky” if it makes them feel good?

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